09-12-2018, 10:11 AM
I do agree that it's better to be with them when they pass.
It is one of the hardest things anyone will experience through their whole life.
Some people, though their hearts are breaking keep the last moments steady for their loved ones, and break down afterwards.
But we aren't all capable of that. For some people it is a situation of sheer horror and they are unable to do it. It is too much for their coping skills.
I hope that these words in the article don't make such people feel more horror and an awful deep guilt -that they have hurt and let down their beloved animal friend in the last moments.
I have quite a lot to do with grieving people, and see that guilt is one of the biggest pains during the grief process; even when it has no basis in anything they have done wrong.
My estimation is that probably about 90% or maybe even more, of people grieving the passing of a loved one are torn by guilt.
It seems to be a natural part of grieving.
To add more guilt to their burden would be unkind.
But yes, I was with my Misty to the last split second....and beyond.
I was always with her anyway, through everything, the fun, the days and nights, the times of upsets and illness, the adventures we had....
But I do know that we are not all built the same and what is severe trauma for some people is just very sad for others.
Also....an animal is not (usually) aware that the final vet visit means "death".
It is just a vet visit. They almost always hate vet visits, so at the last visit (unless they are already dying or semi conscious) -they are going to be just as uneasy as they usually are. That doesn't necessarily mean they are thinking their human companion has left them to "die alone" or with strangers.
They are naive about things like that. They don't think like we do.
But they will have "picked up" on their caretaker's heartbreak and unease. They will be in a place they don't like or might even be frightened of. The combination will make them upset -yes.
And when they do pass, it is very possible the first thing they will do is dash out of there and follow their people right back home again! (before transitioning.)
But yes....it's a good idea if those who can cope pull out all the stops and be there for their loved one crossing over.
It is one of the hardest things anyone will experience through their whole life.
Some people, though their hearts are breaking keep the last moments steady for their loved ones, and break down afterwards.
But we aren't all capable of that. For some people it is a situation of sheer horror and they are unable to do it. It is too much for their coping skills.
I hope that these words in the article don't make such people feel more horror and an awful deep guilt -that they have hurt and let down their beloved animal friend in the last moments.
I have quite a lot to do with grieving people, and see that guilt is one of the biggest pains during the grief process; even when it has no basis in anything they have done wrong.
My estimation is that probably about 90% or maybe even more, of people grieving the passing of a loved one are torn by guilt.
It seems to be a natural part of grieving.
To add more guilt to their burden would be unkind.
But yes, I was with my Misty to the last split second....and beyond.
I was always with her anyway, through everything, the fun, the days and nights, the times of upsets and illness, the adventures we had....
But I do know that we are not all built the same and what is severe trauma for some people is just very sad for others.
Also....an animal is not (usually) aware that the final vet visit means "death".
It is just a vet visit. They almost always hate vet visits, so at the last visit (unless they are already dying or semi conscious) -they are going to be just as uneasy as they usually are. That doesn't necessarily mean they are thinking their human companion has left them to "die alone" or with strangers.
They are naive about things like that. They don't think like we do.
But they will have "picked up" on their caretaker's heartbreak and unease. They will be in a place they don't like or might even be frightened of. The combination will make them upset -yes.
And when they do pass, it is very possible the first thing they will do is dash out of there and follow their people right back home again! (before transitioning.)
But yes....it's a good idea if those who can cope pull out all the stops and be there for their loved one crossing over.
